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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29871723">Hogwarts Rules</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/richbelle/pseuds/richbelle'>richbelle</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Marauders - Fandom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 02:01:11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,473</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29871723</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/richbelle/pseuds/richbelle</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The Mauraders are the reason for a number of school rules</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sirius Black/Remus Lupin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Flea Bag</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>So I have this head canon that at one point during 6th year, just after Remus and Sirius had gotten together, Padfoot &amp; Moony wandered off for some alone time during a full moon.<br/>James and Peter don’t know where they went or what they were doing but they ended up with a horrible flea infestation. And I’m sure they’re some kind of magical flea that just multiplies every time they scratch.<br/>Cut to the next day in the shrieking shack and all four of them are scratching like there’s no tomorrow.<br/>They wander back through the castle and don’t realise fleas are jumping off them like crazy. They go about their day none the wiser but still scratching.<br/>The next day the students of Hogwarts wake up covered in fleas. There’s fleas in the dorms, fleas in the common rooms, the classrooms, the great hall, the staff room, EVERYWHERE.<br/>That morning at breakfast McGonagall is losing it “Where did they come from!?!? Who is responsible for this!?!?<br/>Sirius stands up, clears his throat and says "Minnie, darling, have you seen how many people in this place have pets? Aren’t you a cat Animagus yourself? Frankly I am SHOCKED that there hasn’t been an infestation before now!?!?”<br/>Slow murmurs spread the hall and everyone starts agreeing with him. <br/>Dumbledore stands up and addresses the hall “Perhaps Mr Black is right Minerva. Professor Slughorn &amp; Madam Pomfrey will be handing out potions to rid the school, I suggest if you have been affected you report to them as soon as you can.”<br/>Meanwhile Remus, who had been sitting there quietly during Sirius’ speech, whispers “Totally worth it Padfoot, nice save.”<br/>And James just glares at both of them while scratching his head.<br/>The Marauders biggest prank and they didn’t have to lift a finger, serve a detention or lose any house points. <br/>Three days later after every last flea has disappeared they see McGonnagall walk past in her animagus form wearing a flea collar…..</p>
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<a name="section0002"><h2>2. No Quidditch For First Years!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It happened the day before they were to have their  first flying lesson and they are about 2 months into the school year so they already have a bit of a reputation. Remus had mentioned that he had never flown on a broom before and that started a chain reaction.</p><p>James was shocked. "You've never flown before Remus?!? Oh it's the best, my parents just bought me the newest broom The Nimbus 1000! Let's go flying when lessons finish!"</p><p>James and Sirius grabbed their brooms and they decided to switch off. So James kicks off for a quick fly around while Sirius shows Remus the basics. Soon Remus is up in the air and having the time of his life and this is the first time the other marauders have seen him let loose a little bit. They both come barreling to the ground to switch the first time and Remus, struck by sudden brilliance decides they should have a game. Peter points out they only have 2 brooms and they don't have access to the school brooms. </p><p>"Gents I have an idea" Sirius blurts suddenly. "2 men to a broom." And he grabs a spare quaffle then jumps on the back of his broom behind Remus while Peter clambers on behind James.</p><p>They fly up to the goal posts and Sirius climbs on to the middle one. James catches on immediately and launches himself at the one on the left. </p><p>"This is never gonna work, we only have one quaffle!" Remus points out.</p><p>After a bit of thought they decide Remus, Sirius and Peter are the keepers and James, being the most experienced is the chaser. So James starts throwing the quaffle at each goal post in turn and gets a few through. Soon enough they have an audience and some of the other first years have joined in.</p><p>Between all of them they have enough brooms for each team to have 6 players on the field and another 3 each on the goals. Some of the older students have gotten wind of what's going on and start to wander down to the quidditch chatting away. </p><p>Of course Dumbledore hears some of them talking and decides he needs to check it out. He watches for a while and is just about to put a stop to it when McGonnagall bursts on to the scene. Immediately she knows who is responsible so she calls everyone to the ground.</p><p>"Potter, Black, Lupin and Pettigrew, explain yourselves this instant!"</p><p>Remus always being a quick thinker tries to explain. "Well Professor we were eagerly anticipating our first flying lesson tomorrow and couldn't wait. So Sirius and James grabbed their broom and we decided to have a bit of a game, then everyone else wanted to play and who are we to discriminate."</p><p>"That does not explain why you were sitting on the goal posts!"</p><p>"Well we didn't have enough brooms to go around for everyone," Sirius chimes in.</p><p>"And did it not occur to you to have subs and take it in turns? No of course not. Detention for all four of you for a week."</p><p>"But professor, which rule did we actually break?" Remus innocently asked.</p><p>After racking her brains, McGonnagall couldn't actually think of a rule so she had to revoke the detentions and settle for a warning and taking away a few points from them.</p><p>This lead to McGonnagall going on a mission and convincing Dumbledore that first years can't be trusted and shouldn't be allowed their brooms at Hogwarts!</p><p>Dumbledore not wanting to argue, concedes and brings in the rule for the new school year.</p><p>What they failed to remember is the marauders were no longer first years......</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Muggle Artefacts Don’t Work</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The summer before 4th year found the marauders at the Lupins house for a week. Remus and Peter had decided to teach the two raven haired purebloods a few things about muggles.<br/>So the boys spent the week seeing everything muggle that they could. This encouraged James to decree the first month of school as Muggle Mischief and Mayhem Month, the only rule is any pranking has to be done the muggle way - no magic allowed!<br/>The week before school starts find them at Diagonal Alley getting their school supplies. They all wander off from their parents and end up at Gringotts to exchange all the Galleons they can for Muggle money and head into Muggle London.<br/>They get a few bits and bobs of everything but the thing they’re most excited about are the Walkie Talkies they find. They pool all their money and buy as many as they can and they end up with 14.<br/>A week into school and they’ve done a few small pranks but nothing note worthy. Until Peter suggests they use the Walkie Talkies in random classrooms throughout Hogwarts. The four of them split up and plant them all over the Castle and hold on to one that they can use.<br/>According to their calculations having only one in each classroom, they won’t be affected by magic. So they start of small, whenever one of them is passing a classroom in their break they make a few noises or voices, anything they can think of.<br/>Two days in, they’re in Herbology with the Slytherins and they’re bored. So they start using their Walkie Talkie.<br/>Snape happens to be standing near one of them and gets suspicious, especially when Sirius takes over. James and Peter are trying their best not to laugh, meanwhile Remus has noticed he can hear Sirius antics behind him and he finds another Walkie Talkie tucked behind a pot behind him.<br/>Just as Snape has decided he’s had enough of The Marauders and throws a hex in their general direction. A ripple of magic cuts through the air and sparks go flying everywhere.<br/>The students have had to duck under their tables to avoid getting hit as the entire greenhouse is slowly engulfed in sparks and smoke and the glass shatters.<br/>Dumbledore is called in and is at a loss as to how it happened, even with Snape blaming The Marauders. He can’t find the cause of it thanks to Remus’ quick thinking in taking the Walkie Talkies and shoving them in his bag.<br/>The Marauders go back through the classrooms and gather up the remaining Walkie Talkies and notice they no longer work. They also realise they doubled up in the Greenhouse because James got overexcited and didn’t read his list properly.<br/>Throughout the rest of the week, the Muggle born students all notice their devices have stopped working and Dumbledore makes the announcement. “Muggle devices do not work in Hogwarts”<br/>It goes down in Hogwarts: A History as a great mystery and Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs get a laugh every time they hear someone mention it in the years to come.</p>
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